It is very difficult to find things to love about ADHD when we are struggling with it. When we cannot get done the simplest things. When we dread the beginning of the summer because of all “that light” (of the freaking sun we need to stay alive)
When for every place we are to go according to our agenda – even when it is the mall to buy something we want, or a gathering with people we love – we picture a stampede of noises, smells, voices, lights, and we… just want to hide…
I have been very patient with my brain during the first months of the grief I am going through. We are all taught to be kind to ourselves, right? If we are stressed; if we’ve worked too much; if we’ve considered for a split of a second to have a brain transplant… We know it’s time to breathe in, breathe out, and simply … to wait it out.
But then, when we begin feeling, “I could go back to it now,” something still feels off. It’s like there had been a flood in our house, we dried everything, but the humidity still lingers.
The thing is, in the neurotypical world we live in, ADHD is the humidity. Always there. Some don’t care, some can’t stand it. And some, seize it to plant the most beautiful flowers even out of season.
So! After having written a few drafts on brain transplants, WA meetings (Whiners Anonymous) and else, I decided instead to plant a flower or two in my brain and yours, by sharing with you things I love about my ADHD.
Repeat the headings out loud after me, if you feel related.
1. I Always Find a Solution
C’mon! Who can say that? We can!
The other day I was at my dad’s, worried about a problem I had (which I had been trying to fix, with no luck). His wife said to me, “But you’ll figure it out. You always do.” And I said, “Oh, I know I will.”
The next morning, I woke up with the solution. It woke me up slapping me in the face.
That being said, sometimes the solutions may not make us happy or may be hard to accept. But “there is a solution, and we’ll find it.”
2. I Can Do Multiple Things at Once, and Sometimes I Perform Better If I Do So
The busier I am, the more I get things done.
Our brain performs like a sharp knife under pressure, and I (don’t judge!) sometimes put mine in a boiling pot and think, “It’s boiling! No time to procrastinate as I do the rest!”
For that reason, I am always taking a course on something, whatever. Having that one activity with its own schedule, helps me arranging my whole life around it.
3. My Creativity! It Is a Wonder of Nature
… Sorry I can’t think about an example right now.
4. I Live in the Now, Without Clocks Nor Motivational Instagram Posts
Ok… Sometimes the “now” is about winning more “points” in a stupid game I have in my iPad (and the “now” lasts sixty minutes). Nobody is perfect. (Time blindness? Shush! Glass half full today!)
But! One, setting alerts on our mobiles and iPads to control our screen time is a solution that works. (I’ll set it up for my game tomorrow; I’m sure I’ll remember)
And two, I can sit in my patio and watch the birds in my tree learning to fly and enjoy it to the tears as if time didn’t exist (Because it DOESN’T. It is an illusion neurotypicals fall for. Be kind to them. Poor people.)
Show me a neurotypical that mind-wanders to chill without a clock. I dare you.
And three! I don’t spend money in watches. Go sell that to … the others…
5. I Have the Vampires’ Humanity Switch, and I Make The Most of It
Whenever I read that we cannot control our emotions, I’m like, “Wait a minute… I may find it hard to control my ‘impulses’, but if I ever need to control my emotions, I’ll be like a neurosurgeon.
It still amazes me that I can do that… When my brain shut down in 2017, I knew I simply needed to make it exercise. But! I couldn’t study (not even read) which is my go-to solution.
So! What did I do to shush the traumas in my mind so I could study? I took a Web Dev course. “Abstract thinking.” It does wonders…
(PS: I’d say I recovered my executive functions to a 70%, from a 10%. High-five!)
6. I Am Never Bored
I am allergic to it.
And it pains me.
I always find something to do… And that something usually ends up being a creative and useful thing.
7. I Can make a Bulletproof Bulleted List About Anything (Pun Intended)
I always remember when I was studying National Defense. At a class, we were giving an exercise where we needed to: brief a president on a plane, with a bulleted list, in five minutes, about a freaking unexpected war.
My classmates, Coronels and else, from all over the world, freaked out.
“I got this, fellas.”
8. I Am a Synonymous of Fun to People
Seriously. At birthday parties, gatherings or whatever, don’t people ask you “C’mon! Tell us! What have you been up to?”
From falling flat on my face in the middle of a crowd (because I don’t know how to walk like a person; I kind of run, always) to doing an activity nobody would have thought about doing, I have a story, ladies and gents.
9. I Can Listen to One Song for Hours, On a Loop (Sometimes Only the First Part; or the Bridge and the Chorus… Glorious!)
Who has the time to create a playlist to run, feel motivated, cry a little bit harder and shit?
Give me one song that sticks. That’s all I need.
(And then I won’t listen to it for years… And then, when I do, I’ll go like, “OMG! This song!” and it all starts again…)
10. My sense of humor. My dry sense of humor. Period.
11. I Can Give Myself Pep Talks That TED Would Pay For (or, “11. My Brain Health Is My Bitch”. I suck at titles.)
Most people wake up in the morning, and the first thing they worry about is, “what am I going to wear?” (The answer is “the same thing I you wore yesterday, but the other.” I mean, who doesn’t have five things of the same things?!?)
And then, they worry about their weight, their workouts, their bodies, bodies, bodies.
Whereas I, I look up, to my brain (‘cos I can) and I ask him (it’s a he, ergo: what he is 🥴), I ask him, “hey buddy, how are you feeling today?”
Sometimes he turns his back on me, and I let him be…
Sometimes he drops a two-feet long parchment paper with a thousand things to do “now”, and I say, “Ok buddy, let me see what’s important. It all looks very tempting! How did you come up with all of that?”
And other times, he simply says, “It’s all good. What do you wanna do today?”
And I say, “I just wanna love you, and kiss you, and hug you.”
(PS: He goes “ugh”)
Now, what am I missing?
Help me out here.
I am so awesome I can’t even…
